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Structure

Back to Writing Basics

Christine de Pisan - Portrait of a Woman
Christine de Pisan. Portrait of a Woman

I recently edited a piece for Martha, a friend of mine. It was good and I hope she publishes it. It was a bit of an unusual story, since it was entirely monologue, talking to herself as if in real time about an abusive work situation and her unfolding understanding and the strength to walk away from it. The actual workplace events occurred over an extended time, but really everything took place in the narrator’s mind, and her voice was powerful and unique, raw and direct.

When she asked me for feedback, I was a little perplexed at first. It is stream of consciousness, and appears to be a spontaneous outpouring of thoughts. She asked me if I just thought it was a mess, since there was no timeline for what was described. How can I make comments about someone else’s lived experience? And what could I tell her that would preserve the immediacy and power of her prose?

In trying to formulate some sort of possibly meaningful feedback, I realized that the internal dialogue did, in fact, follow the familiar narrative structure. The writer started with her hurt and despair (beginning), relived some of the abuse (middle), and came to the awareness that she did not have to be manipulated into doubting herself—and could move on from the job (end). It then became very clear to me what would make the already strong work stronger: paying attention to the narrative structure while preserving its immediacy.

Rather a “Doh!” moment for me, I have to confess. The tried and true “rules” of writing are tempting to dismiss, but they always provide a touchstone. Once I realized there was indeed a narrative structure, I was able to plug into another one of my go-to’s for my own writing: using all the senses, and being specific, so that the reader can place themselves into the scene we have created. Even though Martha’s piece was all in the mind, she was still thinking about events in the physical world of space and time. It makes me think about the nature of memory and the relationship to the present moment.

Whether I’m struggling with my own writing or scratching my head trying to figure out what to say to an author, there are a few basic principles that are good places to start:

  • What’s the point? Is everything in the piece relevant to the point?
  • What is the structure? Even the most deconstructed postmodern writing has some sort of narrative. Deviations from the structure are best when carefully and intentionally done.
  • If there are descriptions, do they bring in as many of the five senses as possible? Are they detailed and specific?
  • Trust yourself, trust your voice.
Categories
Academic writing Thesis statements

Writing Process: Being Specific

Lois Wilson and Warner Baxter in 1926 screen version of The Great Gatsby
Lois Wilson and Warner Baxter in the lost 1926 silent film version of The Great Gatsby.

One of the most common struggles students seem to have is how to go beyond vague generalizations. Being clear about what you mean through the use of examples makes your writing easy to understand. A good approach focuses on “showing” not “telling.”

To be clear about the difference, telling means a statement without letting the reader know how or why you reached that conclusion.

Example #1: Student writing that needs revision:

In the novel The Great Gatsby, all the characters are unattractive. The author did not develop sympathy for the main characters, Jay Gatsby and Daisy Buchanan. They got what they deserved. This novel is vastly overrated.

Example #2: On the other hand, the Spark Notes description of Gatsby’s empty, decadent characters provides rich detail that goes beyond moral judgment.

The luncheon with Wolfshiem gives Nick his first unpleasant impression that Gatsby’s fortune may not have been obtained honestly. Nick perceives that if Gatsby has connections with such shady characters as Wolfshiem, he might be involved in organized crime or bootlegging.

One purpose of the novel is to show the moral bankruptcy of social elites during the Roaring Twenties. Even though the Spark Notes version (hated by teachers) covers similar territory as Example #1. However the website author shows us the immoral behavior rather than just stating it as a fact. It is important to let the readers understand why you make the statements you do.

The thesis statement of Example #1 is that the characters are unattractive. The implication in the concluding sentence is that the writer did not enjoy the novel. Both are valid perspectives. Between the beginning and the end, however, there is something missing: Details that show the reader why you made those statements.

Categories
Editing Grammar Punctuation Syntax

What Can a Good Editor Do for You? Matters of Style and Choice

Editing: Arranging, revising, and preparing a written, audio, or video material for final  production, usually by a party (called an editor) other than the creator of the material. The objectives of editing include (1) detection and removal of factual, grammatical, and typographical errors, (2) clarification of obscure passages, (3) elimination of parts not suitable for the targeted audience, and (4) proper sequencing to achieve a smooth, unbroken flow of narrative. —BusinessDictionary

There are probably a lot of times when running something through Grammarly or even Microsoft Word’s grammar checker will take care of your problems. We ourselves make use of them. They provide a quick way to find things like extra spaces between words. Sometimes Word tells you that a comma is needed, which is not always correct. What you have to understand is that punctuation is also a matter of style and choice. An extreme example is the poetry of e e cummings, who sometimes intentionally dispensed with punctuation altogether.

Contemporary writers tend to avoid using commas as much as possible. On the other hand, lawyers may introduce commas liberally in order to be more precise. Recently the New York Times reported on a lawsuit which hinged on a missing, so-called “Oxford comma.”

In spite of the fact that we are all taught rules for using commas in school, in the actual practice of writing, the rules may be more flexible than you think. An editor can help you make decisions on using them, which really depends on your purpose and perhaps your personal preferences.

I remember when our daughter came home from fourth grade with an F on a “comma test.” As we went over the exam, she expressed dismay at my suggestions as to where the commas should be. “No,” she said firmly, “you put a comma where you take a pause.” She then proceeded to read the sentences aloud, breaking where she thought was appropriate. She made complete sense, but it was different than what the test designer had decided was the correct answer. The point is, the hard-and-fast rules with regards to commas and other matters are often not helpful.

Another reason to use an editor is to insure proper syntax. Syntax means arranging words and phrases into larger phrases, sentences and paragraphs. Grammar checkers cannot do this very well, although they sometimes try to. There are nuances of word meaning that are just not quite right and don’t convey the intended meaning.

A good editor thus makes sure that your grammar and syntax carry through your whole work, including your use of commas.